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In defense of Elitch Gardens
Saturday, June 16, 2007

So! Here's yet another breastfeeding in public brouhaha! I will probably lose many readers who are breastfeeding mommies, but I just have to be true to myself and voice my opinion about this issue -- again.

What is so wrong with being courteous of those around you if you are a breastfeeding mother and cover up, or as in the case of the mother breastfeeding in front of the daycare, move to an available room?

A woman was asked by two park security guards at Elitch Gardens, a Colorado theme park, to move or either cover up when she tried to breastfeed her 5-month-old by the wave pool. Sounds reasonable to me. She refused because Colorado state law does say mothers can breastfeed anywhere they have a right to be.

But, this is what really threw me.

Skrydlak-simlai, 28, of Spearfish, S.D., said the guards later got a supervisor, who in turn, got two Denver police officers to talk to her. By that time, she said she had finished nursing her son and pulled her swimsuit back up.

Pulled her swimsuit back up? That is just too much. I can't take it. Babies have a right to feed, but other parents have the right for their children not to see another woman's breast. I don't care if a baby is at the end of it.

According to the Rocky Mountain News article,

Elitch Gardens released a statement that breast-feeding at the park is allowed, but noted: "Our concern was not that she was breast-feeding her child, but that she was exposed while doing so, making several guests uncomfortable enough to bring it to the park management's attention."

I've only read a few breastfeeding mothers' work who agree with me and most of them are

conservative Christians, which I am NOT. Rhonda Graham, a breastfeeding mom herself and opinion columnist for DelawareOnline.com once wrote:

It is self-righteous hubris to assert that you have no responsibility to consider the potential discomfort that breast-feeding creates when you share the public space."

I am so glad someone, anyone agrees with me!

Labels: breastfeeding in public

posted by Jennifer James @ 10:37 AM,

6 Comments:

At June 16, 2007 2:56 PM, Jennifer said...: Again, I have to respectfully disagree. I love your blog, but on this subject, I believe you are mistaken. Not because I don't think everyone should take into consideration the feelings of others, but because breastfeeding mothers are being asked to make considerations that others are not.

I would venture to guess that at the very same wave pool there were or have been women wearing thong bikinis and men wearing speedos. There were or have been triangle tops that barely covered the breast of some women, swim trunks that ride so low the crack of a mans butt hangs out. It is probably not rare to see someone in a suit that becomes see-through when wet, or an obese person in a suit that is too small. And yet, offensive as some of these sites may be to some people, I would be surprised to learn that any one of the offending parties were asked to leave the area or cover themselves.

As I have mentioned before, it is not usually the amount of skin showing that causes the offense. It is the mere act of breastfeeding. The Amy Milliron case in Arizona comes to my mind each time the 'cover up' argument is used, because she was, indeed, covered up.

I stand by my belief that in order for mothers who DO wish to cover or nurse discreetly, to do so with out fear of harrassment, we need the women who are willing to breastfeed as openly as Maggie Gyllenhaal and the woman from the Elitch Gardens incident.

I admire you for standing by your belief that we don't, and your ability to articulate this belief without resorting to name calling. You won't lose me as a reader simply because we dissagree on one subject of such an important topic!
At June 16, 2007 7:16 PM, Honey said...: I have no problem with showing a breast...like what Maggie was doing...but pulling down the whole top & being topless...I'm not happy with that...now if only one breast was exposed to nurse...ahh...the officials can gawk at the speedo caught up that overweight man's bottom.

I could see how being topless could cause concern...but if only one breast was exposed?...nah...

Honey
At June 16, 2007 8:48 PM, rach said...: Here's the thing though, why is it the breastfeeding mother that has to accommodate others who, for whatever reason have some issue with a baby nursing? What is the 'offended party' doing to accommodate her?

Breasts are sexualized all over the world. I saw more exposed breasts in Europe than I ever do here. Yet in Europe women can NIP without having the cops called on them. Why?

This is more about the American notion that the rights of the individual matter more than the rights of the whole. Breastfeeding makes moms and babies healthier, costs taxpayers less, is better for the environment, helps families create bonds - is the food babies are supposed to eat - all these things not only benefit families, they benefit everyone in this country...but along comes an individual who can't handle a boob in public, and suddenly they matter more than the rest of us? No way. Folks have issues, perhaps they are the ones who should go in a room alone and think about just what it is that so offends their sensibilities when they see the mother baby dyad doing what they are supposed to be doing, I bet it has nothing to do with a mom breastfeeding her baby.

I too find your blog very interesting especially your take on breastfeeding through history, and I will continue to read. However I think you are off base with this one.
At June 17, 2007 2:20 PM, Fat Lady said...: Well, I know we are going, at some point, to just have to agree to disagree. But I can't let go yet of hoping to convince you that your efforts would be better served supporting breastfeeding mothers rather than those who choose to discriminate against them.

I mean, this whole idea that women should hide while nursing in order to protect the sensibilities of those who feel uncomfortable with it is just wrong and prejudicial on the most basic level.

It's the same thinking that was behind laws against interracial marriage. The same thinking that's behind the military's "don't ask, don't tell" policy towards gay people in the armed services. It's , "Hey, we don't feel comfortable with what you do with your life - so you'd better hide it."

And, in these cases, as with nursing in public, it's been presented as a moral or decency issue. There were those who said (or still do say), it's just not morally right for people of different races or the same sex to be involved romantically. They contended, or still contend, that they have the right to not have to witness, or even really be aware of these things that make them uncomfortable.

More dramatically, and more heinously, the Jim Crow laws in this country were based on the "comfort" of one group of people over another. They were in place because white people were uncomfortable having to eat, or use the same bathroom or sit on the bus next to black people.

My father sat at lunch counters, being berated and yelled at (fortunately I don't think he was ever unlucky enough to be one of the people who got food dumped on him) to protest these horrible laws. And there were certainly those (even some black people) who thought, "Why do this? Why make people uncomfortable? Why not just go and eat in your own restaurants?"

Of course the rights of breastfeeding mothers can't completely be equated with the racial civil rights movement. But one aspect is clearly identical in both situations - in all situations like this -

Change makes people uncomfortable.

It has nothing to do with a mother being discreet or not. It has nothing to do with modesty or morality in any way.

It has to do with change. People don't like change. They resist it. And there's a change happening in regard to how babies are fed and how women's breasts are viewed. And there are people who just don't feel comfortable with that.

Fortunately, there are always those who refuse to respect other people's fear of change. They are willing to be the first to sit down on a bus, or walk hand in hand with the person they love, or breastfeed (even if it means exposing a breast) wherever they are when their child is hungry.
At June 18, 2007 1:34 PM, roslynholcomb said...: Personally I am more offended by the sight of all these young women running around showing their butt cleavage than I am at any nursing mother. The whole notion of a woman having to cover up to keep from offending others is specious at best. If Ms. Gyllenhaal bared her breast for a movie or to flash Letterman, there would be no controversy at all. But horrors, instead of using her mammary glands to titillate men, she used them for the express purpose they were made for: To feed babies. There is a blatant sexism behind the notion that women should not expose their bodies, unless its for the stimulation of men. That alone, IMO is a good enough reason for as many women as possible to NIP.

I nursed my son for almost two years, and I was careful to be modest, but no way did I put him under a blanket. Primarily because I live in ALABAMA. Most of the time it was simply too damned hot for such 'modesty.' Besides, he wouldn't stay under a blanket anyway.

While I wouldn't expose my whole breast, I support women who choose to do so, because I believe this issue is used to keep women from breastfeeding. This is especially true of young women, who might not be as secure as an old battleaxe like myself. Let's face it, there's always the risk of exposure, no matter how careful you are. After all, these are children we're dealing with here, not dolls. My son took a great deal of pleasure in pulling up my top whenever he got a chance. He thought it was hilarious. Some women may fear being censured should something like that happen, and simply choose not to nurse at all. Given those two options, I'd rather women, especially black women choose to breastfeed even if it means exposing themselves while NIP.
At June 18, 2007 4:02 PM, Eilat said...: It seems to me that this issue is actually underscoring a very sinister and ugly form of mysoginy in our culture. I am not accusing you, Jennifer of this. Not at all. But when I think of the person who walks up to a woman and asks her to leave/cover up while breastfeeding, it occurrs to me that that takes a great deal of chutzpah! It takes guts, I think, to walk up to a stranger and make such a bold request of her. And, in general, people dont just go up to other people and express their complaints and ask them to change their ways. In fact, I am often annoyed at how complacent people are at rude and offensive behavior. No one says anything when people talk though a movie or when rowdy 13 year olds trampel over toddlers in playground areas where they dont belong. I am constantly annoyed and perplexed by how people will put up with all sorts of offenses and keep their mouths shut.

The times I notice that people do speak up is when they feel they have authority or are otherwise above the person they are criticizing. And this is what I think lies at the root of this whole issue. A nursing mother is in an inherently vulnerable position. She is the epitome of "woman" at that momenet, and made even more vulnerable by the small latched on baby in her arms. She is the perfect target of anyone who is "offended". How easy is it to feel superior by shoo-ing her away, knowingly embarrassing her in public.

Reading these stories of these women lately has convinced me that these so-called "offenses" are just an excuse to put someone down. And the "offended" person gets to feel big and powerful in return. Because, as the first commenter, Jennifer, said, there are plenty of offensive things to see at the pool. A breastfeeding mother is just a perfect target.