10 Steps
to School
Year Success
By Katie Basson
One
of the most important aspects of parenting, is ensuring that your child
gets a good education. School is a place where your child not only
learns skills such as reading and writing; it is also where your child
will learn about friendship, responsibility, and fairness. In short,
school is a test run for the ‘real world’, and your child needs your
help to navigate this complicated arena. When your child was a baby,
you set your life around nap times and diaper changes,
1. Establish
Consistent Routines
Take the ‘year at a glance’ approach. If you have a child starting
first grade and one in fourth, one a musician and the other an athlete,
then you must sketch out how you will achieve a balance between school,
their activities, your work, and your activities. It is best to look at
all of these areas at once, so that you can spot the trouble areas.
Once you have the big picture, it is time to ask how you can set up a
regular routine to ensure that everyone’s needs are met, including
yours.
Early
in the school year, decide which activities will fit, and which will
have to be postponed. One of the biggest areas of concern for modern
families is activity overload. Avoid it! Now that you know what
activities you will be engaged in, decide where homework fits and set a
regular time for it. Whether there are assignments or not, this should
be the time of day that your child always does a little extra school
work. When will you have dinner? If possible, make it at the same time
everyday and expect all family members to attend. Don’t eat on the
run! If you have to eat in the car in order to make everything fit,
then you are doing too much!
2. Set Reasonable
Bedtimes
Open any magazine in America
and you will find a story on the cumulative sleep debt that Americans
are suffering from. It causes accidents, ill health, and poor work
performance. It has the same effect on young students. Without enough
sleep, their learning suffers as does their behavior. Additionally,
lack of sleep makes kids prone to getting sick, which means they miss
school and get behind in their learning.
Avoid these problems by setting a
reasonable bedtime for your children and sticking to it. According to
Dr. Jodi Mindell, Ph.D., a member of the National Sleep Foundation,
elementary age children need between 10-12 hours of sleep each night.
She also recommends allowing an additional 10-20 minutes to that amount
in order to account for the time is takes your child to fall asleep.
Keeping these times in mind, your child’s bedtime should be no later
than 8:30pm.
3. Learn to
Say No
There are many demands placed on our time. There are after school
opportunities galore: sports, music, drama, art, and more. Parents have
an equal number of options for after work activities. Parents want to
provide the best for their children and many believe that giving them
access to numerous opportunities is the best way to enhance their
learning. In fact, the best way to enhance a child’s learning is to
allow them to slow down and think about what happened in class and to
talk to them about it. This type of reflection can only come when
parents and children have some downtime together. I advocate the motto:
“Just Do Nothing”.
4. Limit TV
Now, I’ll be the first to
admit that I love TV. I loved cartoons as a kid, and I love sitcoms and
drama shows now. But I’m careful not to watch TV to the exclusion of
all other forms of entertainment. Kids are not as good at moderating
their exposure to TV. They need the help of their parents to make good
choices and to limit the time spent being a passive observer. Kids
learn best when they are actively involved in what they’re doing.
Reading, talking, exploring, drawing, building, playing—these are all
important parts of childhood. Make sure that they don’t get squeezed
out by too much Scooby Doo.
5. Encourage
Reading
Research has shown that one
of the greatest predictors of academic success is the amount of time a
student reads. When asked by the parents of my students what they
should do to help their child learn, I always answer, “Get them to
read.” Books not only open new worlds and ideas for children, they
build their vocabulary, improve their memory, grow their imagination,
and teach them valuable thinking skills. Time spent reading is an
investment in your child’s future.
6. Support
Your Child’s Teacher
It is an unfortunate fact of
modern day society that teachers feel less support from parents,
administrations, and governments than ever before. This is a shame, not
only for the hard working teachers who deserve to feel respected as
professionals, but for the students they teach. Students receive the
best education when they are part of a committed triumvirate. For a
child to truly learn in school, all three members of the team need to
work together. The teacher, student, and parents need to be all working
towards the same goal with commitment and help from one another. All
parts of the triangle must be connected for the goal to be met. Go
against the tide, give your child’s teacher the respect she deserves and
the support she requires. Your child will thank you.
7. Enlist
Support
It truly does take a village
to raise a child. Too often these days, however, parents find
themselves struggling to do it all with very little support. If you
live near grandparents, aunts, or uncles, ask if they can occasionally
go to the soccer game, or pick up the art materials, or buy the new
notebook. Very often it is the little tasks that combine to make
parents feel overwhelmed. Spreading the small tasks around to willing
volunteers may give you more time to focus on the important aspects of
the school year. If family members aren’t available to help, exchange
help with neighbors and friends.
8. Practice
What You Preach
In order to make the school
year go more smoothly, it is important that your child is responsible,
timely, and well-behaved. You are far more likely to have a child who
behaves this way, if you model appropriate behavior for them. If you
are frequently late, often forget important items, and are stressed and
irritable most of the time, you are far more likely to have chronic
problems with your children—especially during the school year when time
is tight. Give your child the skills to succeed by working on them
yourself. Nobody’s perfect, but if you show that you ask of yourself
the same things you ask of them, then you are more likely to garner
their cooperation.
9. Plan Ahead
If you fail to plan, then
plan to fail. Harsh though that statement may be, it often happens that
you’d experience more success at school if you’d take the time to plan
ahead. If you know that your daughter is going to appear in a play
during the month of November, and that it will require lots of
rehearsals after school, don’t enroll her in tap class and swimming.
When you know that time will be tight, it also makes sense to speak to
your child’s teacher in order to advise him of the situation and to get
his help with scheduling homework. Always keep in mind what is coming
up next week and what may be required due to the seasons. Getting to
school in September may not be much of an issue, but what will you do
when the snow flies?
10. Keep your
Eye on the Prize
Being committed to managing the school year well takes effort. Keeping
your family balanced despite all of the demands on everyone’s time can
be difficult. All of it can be managed better if you always stay
focused on your purpose. Your purpose as a parent is to raise
well-adjusted children who can enter society and forge a good life on
their own. They need a good education in order to do this. How to
ensure that your child receives the best education possible ought to be
the first thing you think about in the morning and the thoughts you keep
as you close your eyes at night.
Katie Basson is a parent, teacher,
and creator of The BITs Kit Better Behavior Kit for Kids™. Katie
teaches seminars on behavior modification techniques, and assists
parents through challenging behavioral and educational issues. She
serves on the Board of Directors of the YWCA and is an educational
advisor to Zoesis, Inc., a children’s software company. Katie’s expert
advice has been sought for articles in The Boston Globe and Parents
Magazine. Sign up for her biweekly Parenting Solutions newsletter at
www.bitskit.com.